History is All You Left Me by Adam Silvera

Title: History is All You Left Me

Author: Adam Silvera

Publisher: SoHo Teen

Released: January 17, 2017

Genre: Young Adult Contemporary, LGBT+

Pages: 320

Format: Hardcover

When Griffin’s first love and ex-boyfriend, Theo, dies in a drowning accident, his universe implodes. Even though Theo had moved to California for college and started seeing Jackson, Griffin never doubted Theo would come back to him when the time was right. But now, the future he’s been imagining for himself has gone far off course.

To make things worse, the only person who truly understands his heartache is Jackson. But no matter how much they open up to each other, Griffin’s downward spiral continues. He’s losing himself in his obsessive compulsions and destructive choices, and the secrets he’s been keeping are tearing him apart.

If Griffin is ever to rebuild his future, he must first confront his history, every last heartbreaking piece in the puzzle of his life.

This is the moment of the end. This is where we give up hope on reversing time, where we abandon finding a cure to death, where we live in this Theo-less universe, where we say goodbye.

Adam Silvera is a special. There is nothing that makes me feel more than an Adam Silvera novel. I don’t know how he does it, but his writing and storytelling are truly captivating. I haven’t cried this much while reading a novel in a long time. This was special. This was raw. This was truly beautiful.

History is All You Left Me is told in two timelines, history and today. Our story follows four boys: Griffin, Theo, Wade, and Jackson. All dealing with love and loss and grief. Griffin is struggling with the death of his first love of his life, Theo, all while dealing with his own secrets and compulsions that have seemed to worsen. Griffin is suffering. He’s broken and walking through like “like a zombie” so to speak. When he meets Theo’s boyfriend, Jackson, at Theo’s funeral an unlikely bond begins to blossom. Griffin and Jackson lean on each other because they are the only two that know, and understand, what the other is really feeling and going through.

Griffin is a special character. I felt for him. Not only was he still heartbroken over his and Theo’s breakup, but he was struggling with Theo’s death. Theo was the love of Griffin’s life and when you see their story unfold in “history” I was truly heartbroken. I was sad for these two lovely guys who felt like they were endgame.

What really pulled me into the story was how real it felt. I didn’t for once think I was just reading a book about someone going through a loss. I felt it. History feels personal, it’s very human and real. When book can make me tear up on page one, you know it’s special. By the end, I couldn’t even count how many times this book reduced me to nothing but a puddle of tears!

Griffin’s pain is not only heartbreaking, but so is Jackson’s. So is Wade’s. You feel so much for these boys who are struggling and have no idea what to do or how to deal with what’s been handed to them.

People are complicated puzzles, always trying to piece together a complete picture, but sometimes we get it wrong and sometimes we’re left unfinished. Sometimes that’s for the best.

If you’re ready for a very emotional, but enlightening read, you need to pick up History immediately. I cannot recommend it enough. It’s beautiful and unforgettable.

I am not going to say too much because this review will turn into a blubbering mess filled with nothing but crying gifs and yelling to read this book. Seriously.